Recognize the Monkey

Have you ever reacted to a situation in a way that you later wished you had handled

differently? Perhaps you thought to yourself, "I could have handled that better." That is the essence of the Monkey in the Mirror program. It aims to help individuals identify behaviors they want to change, take note of them, identify the triggers that lead to those behaviors, and then develop a plan to replace undesirable behaviors with more positive ones.

While comparing ourselves to monkeys may seem odd, it can actually help us identify the actions that have led us to this point and guide us towards better choices in the future.

By separating who we are in the present moment from our past actions and the person they have shaped us into, we can improve our self-observations. If you find yourself acting in a way that contradicts what you truly want because they don't align with your values, I encourage you to label it as your 'monkey mind.'

For example, let's say you want to stop yelling at your children when you're overwhelmed, but you end up losing control and going overboard. We might already understand the concept of the monkey mind, but we haven't associated it with ourselves yet.

If we can recognize that our 'monkey mind' took over, acknowledge that our emotions got the best of us, and label those instances as 'monkey mind,' we can start identifying the triggers. What causes that monkey mind to surface?

Evaluating our behaviors in this way, without making excuses or blaming others, can provide valuable insights and empower us to make positive changes. By keeping our best self in mind when the 'monkey' tries to take over, we can gradually become better, one trigger at a time.

Below, I have listed a few common triggers for various negative feelings that often cause unwanted behaviors. Take some time to familiarize yourself with them and observe your monkey mind over the next few weeks.

Common triggers to anger can vary from person to person, but some common triggers include feeling disrespected, experiencing injustice or unfairness, feeling threatened or attacked, facing obstacles or frustrations, and having unmet expectations.

Common triggers to sadness can vary from person to person, but some common triggers include experiencing loss, going through a breakup, feeling lonely, facing rejection, or dealing with a significant life change. It's important to remember that everyone's experiences and triggers for sadness can be unique.

Some common triggers to stress can include work-related pressures, financial difficulties, relationship problems, major life changes, health issues, and even everyday hassles like traffic or deadlines. It's important to note that triggers can vary from person to person, as everyone has different stressors that affect them.

Common triggers to loneliness can vary from person to person, but some common triggers include social isolation, lack of meaningful connections or relationships, major life changes such as moving to a new place or losing a loved one, feeling misunderstood or disconnected from others, and experiencing rejection or abandonment.

Some common triggers to unhealthy eating can include emotional eating, stress, boredom, convenience, and social pressure.

Common triggers to idleness can include lack of motivation, fatigue, lack of interest, procrastination, and a sedentary lifestyle.

In a few days, be on the lookout in your in-app program for a video that will teach you how to counteract some of the reactions that occur after being triggered.

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